> jumping into life.

« Home | these days i fluctuate mostly between feeling like... » | in the doctor's office, there is a large spiral-bo... » | now, i'm as comfortable with my body and my sexual... » | malaria pills cost a whole hell of a lot. » | i went most of the day without realizing the date,... » | i'm awake really hideously early (particularly con... » | two things: first, we bought my tickets to costa ... » | a lovely long walk through garrapata canyon yester... » | at yac today, we had a writer's workshop. we sat i... » | and blogger sucks. » 


"and judging by your birthday," said the nice lady selling me travel insurance, "you probably went to high school with my nephew. john doe."

my heart stopped, for just a moment, and my hands went cold. i nodded. "yeah. yeah, i did." i didn't mention to her the screaming, or the school restraining order, or the police.

"he's up in davis now, so i don't get to see him very often."

i closed my eyes. "how's he doing?"

she paused, her hand frozen over my application, then looked up at me, speaking slowly. "he's alright. he has some... difficulties." she finished filling in my passport number. "i really feel for him." another pause. "he's my husband's nephew, really."

we finished my application and the transaction, smiled, wished each other a good day. i was almost back to my car when the anger hit me, and the fear, rushing in alternating waves up my legs and around my spine and settling pricklysharp in the back of my skull. for just the barest second my vision went dark with terror and memory, and i shook all the way home, praying that she doesn't have a chance to talk to him until she's forgotton all about me.