an odd day. there's storm in the air, and it's been crackling at me since last night. we woke up late when my phone rang, but i ignored it. it rang again, later, and i picked it up to find that my dog was dying. as we left to find breakfast, it rang again, to say that the bleeding was internal and couldn't be stopped.


i drove home bawling, speeding, legs sore from kickboxing and a long night. we'd gone to the midnight movie and denny's and then collapsed, and driving home my mind was hazed with grief and insomnia. eventually we all went down to the vet's and said goodbye, then drove to the beach and stared at the waves until we finished crying.


life picks up; we went to costco for superbowl supplies, and tonight i went dancing with a friend from the coffeeshop, and now it's barely midnight and i'm so tired i can hardly see. the absence of barking when i opened the door was like a blow, and my legs are still sore. i don't think i'll sleep well.